Did i love you

Love is something I don't know,
I only know it from a video.
But i want to see it with my own eyes,
But i tried to apologize.
For everything I did,
Stay with me,for our kid.
Love is something that
I finally learned,
But it returned.
I never want to lose you again,
But I don't know when.
I surrender that i didn't love you,
So my love for you wasn't true.
I leave you as fast as I can,
I only loved you because you
were a militairy man!!